I just wrapped up a series of cultural interviews for a client. It’s one of my favorite activities in my role as a leadership development and operations effectiveness consultant. I love meeting one-on-one with people; hearing their stories, understanding their challenges, celebrating their successes. Last week, it was twenty-four people in a department that is struggling with lower than expected productivity and higher than acceptable turnover. I appreciate clients who are truly interested in what their people have to say.
Of course, for my final report and recommendations to have any value, I need complete honesty from the people I meet with. I start each interview with a series of statements to explain the process and reassure the individual that I will keep all of their comments confidential. No one sees my notes but me. I report on identified trends and do not tie any individual comments to any specific person.
Generally, people are very accepting of my premise. I see deep breaths exhaled, shoulders relaxed and eye contact made. The conversations are nearly always very open once that trust has been established.
One person, however, reminded me of the importance of my role in the success of the project. She reached out, put her hand on my arm, looked me in the eye and quietly said:
Don’t forget, we are trusting you to protect our truth.
I can’t adequately explain how much impact that statement had on me. It is truly one of those things that is now written on my heart and will remain top of mind as I continue to do my work.
What a responsibility for each of us!
The people we coach or counsel, the people we lead or mentor, the people who share their struggles or dreams with us; they are all trusting us with their truth. The most meaningful, powerful and authentic relationships grow out of trust and truth-sharing.
The use of the word protect, however, gave the statement an even deeper meaning.
The interviewees weren’t just trusting me enough to give me their truth, they were trusting me to protect their truth. Using Merriam-Webster’s definition of protect, the individuals I interviewed were counting on me to defend their truth; shielding their story from exposure or destruction. They needed me to guard against restriction of their truth, committing to the whole truth, not just conveniently selected portions of it. They were counting on me to maintain the integrity of their story, keeping it free from bias and unfair interpretation.
As I prepared my final report and recommendations for my client to act upon, these words weighed heavy on my mind.
As leaders, friends, or family members, let’s commit to protecting the hearts and minds that open up to us. Let’s carefully and lovingly protect the trust that binds us together and the truth that crosses between us.
