Like many – perhaps you – I will not be celebrating the joy of motherhood with my Mom on Mother’s Day. Mom died of Alzheimer’s related complications in 2012. She had spent the last seven plus years in the Alzheimer’s care unit of a nursing home; her mind had deteriorated long before her body gave out.
For those of you who also find yourself without your Mom physically on the earth, consider this twist on Mother’s Day: let’s remember all that our Moms meant in our lives but, instead of receding into mourning, let’s also celebrate the acts of mothering we are still blessed with.
For most of us, the first experience we have with mothering was, in fact, our own mother. I can’t possibly speak to all that our Moms mean to us, that’s so intensely personal. Let’s think beyond that relationship.
Who else has mothered you?
Who delivered the chicken soup when you were too ill to cook? Who listened when your heart was broken? Who cheered when you landed that job, finished that project, painted that room, bought that car, or published that story? Who shared their experiences when you were exasperated with your child? Who told you that you will actually live through their teenage years?
Who gave you a hug just because they were so happy to see you? Who holds your hand when you need some quiet comfort? Who nags you about eating right, going to the doctor, working too hard, and getting enough rest? Who supports your goals? Who challenges your crazy ideas? Who would welcome you into their home even if all you wanted to do was take a nap?
Who really cares about you, no matter what?
This weekend, especially, I am thankful for the mothering I have received in my life. From my Mom, absolutely. And also my best friend’s Mom, my mother-in-law, my husband, my co-workers, my kids, my teachers, and all the people who take time out of their busy lives to care about me and for me.
To each of them, thank you for your acts of mothering. I don’t know where I would be without it.
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Photo credit: Heart Cups Contribution by Kumar’s Edit, used with Creative Commons license.
